When I started to plan going back to work I started to plan what the kids were going to do in the summer holidays.
I’d accrued loads of leave and planned to take the majority off in the school holidays, but there were a couple of weeks that I wouldn’t be able to.
So we planned to take Big Pig down to his grandparents for the week.
Now the last few weeks have been tricky for Big Pig in hindsight (the arse that you are) it was his Chicken Pox that turned him in to a different version of himself and not a very nice one at that.
So as the time approached I felt a mixture of relief followed by immense guilt. Relief that we would get a break from each other then guilt because I felt relief.
Also, was he ready to be apart from me, was he ready to be apart from Piglet? All I knew was that he adored his grandparents, who are fabulous with him and that he would have lovely time. I also reasoned that my husband and I would both be at work so he wouldn’t of seen much of us anyway.
I also think it’s important for him to go somewhere and come back again, building the trust that he’s here forever which he doubts all the time.
The morning he left I didn’t quite know what to do with myself. The house was calm, eerily quiet, it was weird!
Ill be honest. Piglet was immensely calmer without her brother around with the lack of sibling rivalry she just did what she wanted to do and although she asked almost every day “where’s my (name)” she was content.
I missed him! I missed his eyes and his hair and his hugs. I missed watching the way he eats, which is pretty rank! I missed all the things that I didn’t think I’d miss!
We FaceTimed a lot and he had the most amazing time. He swam, he played, he baked, he shot his grandad with a £1 bow and arrow.
And when he came home I just couldn’t stop hugging him, no one got a look in for at least 20 minutes whilst I smothered him (poor Big Pig).
He’d grown a bit in every way, and one of the first things he said to me was; “I’m with you forever and when I go to grandma’s I always come back”.
And with that I was reassured that I’d made the right decision.